Sunday, May 6, 2012

For HER...Pour ELLE

Vivement tes douze ans.-                                   
Roll out your twelfth...I woke up this morning thinking of you, nothing peculiar, for the past twelve (12) years, you have been my first reflection in the morning, and my curtain call at night; however, this aurora, as the sun signals another bright morning, I have decided to draft a letter to you, just to acknowledge how much I love you, and how proud I am to be your imperfect father; see, mon adorée, if I could go back in time, back in the future, there are so many things that I would do, and say differently, but one thing I would not change for the world is having you as a daughter; life's road map is never clear, teeming with twists, and turns, Daddy Boo is getting old, and inexorablement, the years are already taking their toll, the anguishes, the calamities, the old vices are catching up with me, there is a storm in my head, and if all these sins are mine, I must have done somebody , some wrong, somehow, somewhere; since I do not want to squander my few remaining chances, since you never know, parce que et puisque (because and since), before the dusk settles, before everything, and anything, I want to take this unique opportunity to tell you: You are beautiful, not because it is the most prominent thing about you, nor the most relevant, but because ladies of all ages, somehow, base their self-worth on their appearances.... Do Beautiful, Be Beautiful.

Bébé grandit.- Baby is growing.-

My heartbeat, mon bébé d'amour, at birth, you knew who you were, what you had a preference for, what you fancied, and did not fancy. In just six (6) short years, you will be eighteen (18) years old, and God willing I will be...well, it does not matter anyway, because I will look a century old, since I am already experiencing  sleepless nights, just thinking of you dating, having a driving license, being away at university,  being a  woman, finding a boyfriend better, and stronger than your own imperfect father; watching you mature petrifies me, and yet, fills me with anticipation, affection, and glee.

The fact that just about twelve (12) years ago you were just a millennium baby, leaves me flabbergasted, you are no longer that wide-eyed baby, scrutinizing, and exploring the world around you, how I wish that I could pick you once again from your crib, and rock-a-bye-baby; just for one (1) more minute, well, I would actually settle for a mere second, with you as a crying tot in need of cuddling, and coddling; these days are long gone, at times, I have the distinct impression that you have already figured out this thing called LIFE. you are self-willed, and individualistic, and at twelve (12) year old, think that you are self-sufficient, you certainly have an opinion, which you let me have whether I ask for it or not, I have to confess that deep down inside, that is the way I have always wanted YOU to be, always expected you to respectfully interrogate anything, everything, and everybody, the simplest reason to ask questions is to get answers, leave no stone unturned.

The times they are A changing.-

In the future, you will meet the varied responsibilities of life, but alas! I hardly possess the skills or the deftness to deal with them, even though I may miss the good ole days, when your only needs were love, food, clean-up, and dodo titit (sleep), I am proud to be the imperfect father of a twelve (12) year old girl with panache. Why? because I love you. Sure, I wish you would listen to me  more,  I wish you would listen to your mother, and be kinder, and gentler to your one, and only brother, I have more than often wished, that you would do your homework the second you get home,  but in spite of my desiderata, I would not want any other twelve (12) year old girl on this planet but  tenacious, brilliant, tenderhearted, beautiful, inquisitive, petulant, straightforward, witty, intelligent, agnostic, self-willed, individualistic: YOU.  This life, my love, is a loan from God, repay it (with interest) with humility, honesty, benevolence, and love .I know you will be the most amazing woman someday, free entirely of narcissism (wishful thinking). You are, and will always be, my proudest accomplishment, and since you are the sweet song that gives rhythm, and melody to my life:

♫♪...I hope you never lose your sense of wonder ♪♫ May you never take one single breath for granted ♫♪ God forbid love ever leave you empty-handed ♪♫...Never settle for the path of least resistance ♫ Living might mean taking chances but they're worth taking ♫... Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance... ♫♪ ...When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider ♫♪...Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens ♫♪ And when you get the chance to sit it out or dance:
♪ ♥ I HOPE YOU DANCE ♫ ♥  JUST DANCE... ♪ ♥ 

† HE exists, and HE does
Bonheur de ma vie, I love you  unconditionally, and forever
Daddy Boo